I should be asleep, but there are a lot of things I should be.
I'm not hungry. But, I am bored. Therefore, I shall eat.
Keep the dream alive: Hit the snooze button.
I'm out partying and I'll be back when I want to.
I am out partying, if you find me, please help me get home safe.
I like diversity in my bed! Every night I sleep with a different pajama.
Unlike my phone, nature doesn't have "call waiting" service. BRB!
I'm offering a sacrifice to the porcelain god in my bathroom.
If I'm missing for a long period of time and you can read this... Help! I may have fell in the toilet!
I'm splashing around the toilet.
I'm off to be a king, on my throne [yup, I'm on the toilet].
My butt is having a serious conversation with the toilet.
Doctors say that it's good to drink 8 to 10 glasses of water per day. Unfortunately, this has some consequences. BRB!
I'm on the toilet, pretending to be a warplane pilot bombing the ocean!
"Passion pour chocolate".. DND, I'm on the toilet!