I got a new pair of gloves today, but they’re both "lefts", which on the one hand is great, but on the other, it's just not right.
My wife asked for me to hand her her lipstick but I accidentally passed her a glue stick. She's still not talking to me.
My wife kicked me out because of my terrible Arnold Schwarzenegger impressions, but don't worry. I'll return.
Son: "Dad, can I eat the cake in the fridge?" Dad: "Sure, but the dining room would probably be more comfortable."
Yesterday, I accidentally swallowed some food coloring. The doctor says I'm okay, but I feel like I've dyed a little inside.
I got a new pair of gloves today, but they’re both "lefts", which on the one hand is great, but on the other, it's just not right.
My wife asked for me to hand her her lipstick but I accidentally passed her a glue stick. She's still not talking to me.
My wife kicked me out because of my terrible Arnold Schwarzenegger impressions, but don't worry. I'll return.
Son: "Dad, can I eat the cake in the fridge?" Dad: "Sure, but the dining room would probably be more comfortable."
Yesterday, I accidentally swallowed some food coloring. The doctor says I'm okay, but I feel like I've dyed a little inside.