On Christmas, if a fat, hairy guy comes and puts you inside a bag, don't panic! I told Santa I want you for Christmas!
If your father is not a millionaire, it is not your fault. But if not ever your father-in-law is not a millionaire, you have no excuse!
I told my wife that a husband is like wine - he gets better and better with time. The next day, she lock me up in the cellar.
Always give your children names ending in a vowel. So when you shout at them, you will better be better heard.
When a girl gets married she always thinks that she won a loved one, but most of the time she realized she lost him.
Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.
Women hope that their men will change after the marriage; men hpe that their women will still be the same after the marriage.
When a husband opens the car's door for his wife, be sure that one of the two are new: the car or the wife.
One day, your prince will show up too. Mine went the wrong way, he's lost and he's too stubborn to ask for directions.